today for the most part was a good day.... However I had some things come my way, that just made me shake my head and wonder what the fuck??? The last straw was something that angered me beyond words, I know it is this family member's nature to be out spoken, I just feel that she was out of line! I am not perfect, nor have I ever claimed to be, maybe that is what made me most upset by her statement. Does she really think it is a joy for me to sit with her, when all she is negative? I get mad at you, at times like this, because you would just tell me that is how she is. It was beyond hurtful, & I know this family member is hurting, & her time with us may be soon over, but damn how much more can I take???? I want to scream, and all I want to do is yell at you and fucking punch you!!! I am so angry at you tonight!!!
But on a good note today ( technically yesterday ) was your sister's b-day. We had a BBQ at your parent's house, and it was nice. It was odd not to have you there, I mean I have been to your parent's house a bit since you died, but we have not had BBQS there, it didn't feel the same without you there....
I feel so all over the place, just wish you were here. Wish I didn't have to deal with all of this on my own! In a bad place, and I hate it....
Love always n forever your wife,
Ang
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