Good morning baby... I was just having a moment, not a bad moment, but remembering the good, & happy memories... I don't know why but one memory that popped in my head was when Kennedy would repeat what we were saying, & she would say Ricky & point to you. You would get so upset, because she learned your name, & was not calling you daddy... And I all I could do was laugh...
Than I was thinking of my best friend Jesse, and remembering some of the better, happier memories I shared with him. One of my favorite memories of Jesse was when my parents, Steven, myself, Jesse, his aunt Debbie & cousin Brian went to Florida. I was sitting next to Jesse on the airplane, & he was laughing at me, because I was scared when the plane was getting ready to take off ( still freaks me out to this day, and I think of Jesse & laugh at myself)....
I can't believe that it has almost been a year, since you left this world... I think I am at the point, where I am no longer trying to figure out why you left, still struggling with the what ifs.... I miss you so very much. Kennedy misses you to.
I know you are watching over us, but it really is not the same.... You would be so proud of how our baby is growing up. She is such a ham, she makes me laugh so much. Of all the things I have done wrong in my life, she is the best thing I have ever done.
I survived another birthday - damn I'm getting old 34 NOW!!! Wowzers!!! It was a bitter-sweet birthday. My first one without you, a loss occurred that same day. Angie's dad past away & my heart is sad for her & her family's loss. You would have liked her dad a lot.
You are my first thought of the day, my last thought of the night. I think of you everyday. Steven & I are gonna plan on doing a b-day party for you this year. Last year your parents, Angie, Gina, Mia, myself & Bean had a birthday dinner. It was nice, but you should have been there...
I suppose I should get going for now, Still trying to clean up around here. Hell at least my kitchen is done!!! I love & miss you so very much baby.
Love always n forever your wife,
Ang
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